I remember getting back from my Club Med vacation many years ago. It was the first trip I took by myself since I didn't have a boyfriend at the time. Even though I had an awesome trip, I looked forward to going home. When I finally did get home, I noticed the emptiness of my apartment which I had never felt before. Prior to living in that apartment in Reseda, I always had roommates, so it was the first time living alone. Gosh, the feeling of being alone was so distinct it made me feel sad and rather lonely. AND, I clearly recall thinking how nice it would have been to have a dog at least greet me when I came home. But there was no one.
It's funny how your thought can manifest so quickly because later that night, I got a call from my sister Dal asking me how my trip went, and then she asked if I were interested in having a little dog. The timing of her question was somewhat eerie. She explained that there was this family who was looking for a home for their dog. Apparently, the dog was bought for their young son who ended up abusing the dog. The boy was picking up the dog and throwing her on the floor. So, the parents felt the dog needed a different home. Dal's mother-in-law at the time had wanted the dog but her apartment manager wouldn't allow her so my sister thought of me.
"The dog is so cute and tiny," my sister said. She paused and then asked, " You can have a dog in your place, right?"
"Ehh, I think so," I replied but I really didn't know. The thought never entered my mind. "What kind of dog is it?" I asked.
"She's a Chihuahua. The lady says she has papers for her but that she's willing to sell her for seventy-five dollars," said Dal.
"Umm, I guess I can look at her but that's all," I said firmly.
The next day I went with my sister to look at the dog. As soon as I walked into the house, a little black Chihuahua ran up to me, stood on her hind legs and put her front paws on me to be picked up. This is how I got Ripley. Ripley wasn't her original name. I changed it to give her courage and strength since she was abused. Ripley came from Sigourney Weaver's character in the movie "Alien" who showed those qualities. A new name for a new life.
To be honest, I didn't get Ripley because I immediately fell in love with her. That didn't happen until I got her home. It was more about rescuing her from that evil boy. When Ripley wanted to be picked up during our first meeting, I felt instinctively that I had to take her. I never even thought about the consequences of that decision. I knew nothing about having a dog except that it needed to be walked. We had dogs growing up but my parents were the main caretakers. So, Ripley was my first dog as an adult, and she was just four months when I got her. Having a puppy was tremendous work which I soon discovered. Along with the work came the vexation and stress with having a puppy and being an inexperienced owner.
It took more than a few walks before Ripley learned she needed to pee and poop during that time. I was so excited when she finally realized what to do. But even so, she peed and pooped everywhere in my carpeted living room because she had free range of the entire apartment except for my bedroom. I didn't know I had to put her in a crate to train her while I was at work. Again, I was totally clueless. At least, Ripley wasn't much of a chewer. She only destroyed two of my shoes in her whole puppyhood.
There was one night that infuriated me to the point of giving up Ripley. I had come home really late from work and found that Ripley had defecated in about five different places and nowhere near her designated area. Her stools weren't all solid either because I wasn't feeding her the best of foods but didn't know it then. I was oblivious to canine nutrition. Nonetheless, I was so angry and aggravated especially since I was exhausted from work. At the time, I was a massage therapist and taught massage therapy up in Palmdale twice a week, and my schedule during those two days was from nine in the morning to nine at night with a huge break in between. It was a split shift. I couldn't go home because Reseda was just too far. Those two days must have been dreadful for a little pup being left alone for that many hours. It certainly was awful for me.
After a month of having Ripley, I felt like a failure because her behavior was worsening, and my work schedule didn't help. So, I called my mom the following evening and told her my situation.
"Mom, I don't think I can take care of Ripley. It's just so difficult. I'm cleaning all the time. I'm tired of it. And, I have days when I'm not home all day. It's not good for her....Umm, can you just take her?" I begged. Even though I already loved Ripley, I was willing to give her up for my sanity.
My mother was quiet for a bit. Then, she finally said in her thick Filipino accent, "No, anak." Anak in the Filipino language of Tagalog meant child. My mother continued, "You need to keep her. It's good for you. She gives you company since you're alone. It'll get better, anak. She'll learn." (I love my mother but when she speaks English it's so much harder to understand her because of her accent. I prefer her speaking Tagalog to me.)
Of course, I was a little stunned by the answer my mother gave me. I thought for sure she would take Ripley and make my life easier. Normally, she would gladly take in any animal but not that time. I felt so frustrated and stuck. Now what, I thought.
Consequently, I walked Ripley more, went to the park often, took her to an obedience group class when she was old enough, and patiently dealt with whatever happened. After my conversation with my mom, I came to the conclusion that life isn't without difficulties and that there was a lesson I had to learn with Ripley. Also, I realized that the minute I took Ripley away from her abusive life, I was responsible for her. It was my obligation to do everything to help her become a balanced dog even if it caused me temporary insanity and fatigue.
Now, it's inconceivable to think about being without Ripley, which is why I say to her frequently, "You're only three years old. You're just a baby dog," when in fact she's fourteen. When I tell her that, she gives me a look that says, "Okay, if you say so." I figure, if I tell her enough, she WILL believe it, and will live another ten years. This is my hope. Besides, dogs will believe anything their owners say, since they are so trusting that way. It would tear my heart to lose Ripley. She was there with me through all my hardships and heartaches. I know Ripley made me be a better person. Also, I let her know that it was because of her that I love dogs so much. She opened my eyes and I thank her for it often.
Needless to say, nothing would make me give her up now. Even if there were a flood in the San Fernando Valley and I had to evacuate my house without her or any of my dogs as so many people did in New Orleans when Hurricane Katrina hit, I wouldn't leave. I would stay with my dogs because I could never abandon them to fend for themselves. I know my husband feels the same way since we discussed the issue during the aftermath of Katrina and we had heard of all those dogs left behind by their owners. The guilt would kill us if we did that.
To say the least, my mother did me a gigantic favor. It was good for me to keep Ripley even though it was tough dealing with her in the beginning, but that was partly due to my own ignorance. She was truly a gift from god, the universe, or whatever you believe in because she came into my life when I needed her. I would do it all over again despite the distress I experienced. As I write this, I am reminded of a pearl. For an oyster to produce a pearl from sand, it takes a lot of irritation, patience and many years. But in the end, you have a beautiful pearl, and that is what Ripley represents to me. I'm just glad it didn't take years to have her trained and disciplined. By the way, I never got my security deposit from that apartment in Reseda, which didn't surprise me at all. The carpet was filthy even after cleaning it a few times, but at that point, I didn't care. I had Ripley.
I sympathize with those of you who have a puppy and are a new dog owner. Initially, it can be a struggle and extremely stressful. But think of your puppy as a pearl in the making and you're the oyster doing what needs to be done and persevering in spite of the irritation. The payoff is priceless. This was the lesson my mother wanted me to learn and Ripley helped me get to that place.
I have a puppy patient I am treating at the vet hospital who is a six month old Great Dane name Vendetta (don't you think with a name like that, you would expect trouble?). Vendetta is truly adorable but she's a wild child. Seeing Vendetta recently for treatment made me think of how Ripley used to be as a pup. But definitely, Vendetta has so much more energy that I can only imagine the havoc she creates at home. During her treatment, she was like a fish out of water because she could not sit still. Fortunately, Vendetta's human mom is experienced with pups unlike myself with Ripley, and has another dog name Lava who, I'm sure, helps diffuse some of that excess energy. The owner is great about walking Vendetta to release her craziness. She takes Vendetta on long hikes at nights at Vasquez Rock in Santa Clarita. Personally, I think she's nuts for hiking in the dark by herself and I've told her that. But she's been doing it for years and knows every inch of that area.
In the meantime, if you do have a new pup, you may want to consider meditation, exercise or acupuncture to help reduce your stress level. You don't need to create unnecessary inflammation in your body that stress produces, because, most likely, you are also tired from cleaning. With regards to acupuncture, it's wonderful for stress, even though many people associate it with pain relief only. Getting acupuncture is a passive way to have your body release endorphins that give us that natural high and overall "feel good" sensation.
Love your dog. If you don't have one, adopt or save one. Then, just know that sometimes what's good for you isn't necessarily what you want or the easiest to do. But remember, there may be a "pearl" just waiting at the end of it. Unfortunately, a "pearl" is never obvious to us in the beginning and middle. It may be to other people around us as it was to my mother. However, we only see it in retrospect. So, follow your instinct as I did with Ripley especially when choosing a dog. If I didn't listen to my intuition when I initially saw Ripley, I would have missed out on one of the best things in my life.
Thank you for visiting my weekly blog. Any comments are welcomed.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Boys and Their Toys
When Morpheus was about a year old, I bought him a squeaky, red paisley doll that I found from Linens 'N Things. It was his first toy and he loved it. He played with it and made sure it was next to him whenever he went to bed. As expected, he chewed on that doll so much that pretty soon it was raggedy, it no longer squeaked, and the inside fillers were exposed. I went back to the store to get another one but there was none left. So, Augustine used duck tape in attempt to keep this doll intact. Morpheus didn't seem to mind the thick, silver bandage that covered his treasure. He still slept with it under his chin and every once in awhile I'd notice he would gently gnaw at it as if he knew it was fragile. It was amusing and touching to see. I don't recall what happened to his doll but I'm sure at one point I had to throw it away.
Since that red doll, I haven't seen Morpheus behave the same way with the other toys I've bought him. He's never displayed the tenderness nor attachment he had with the red doll. Ripley and Elektra are not into toys. Occasionally, Elektra enjoyed chewing on a squeaky ball and tormenting Morpheus with it when he didn't have one. Even though I would give each one the same squeaky toy, Morpheus would somehow lose his and Elektra would become in possession of it. When that happens, Morpheus, like a little boy, would start barking and I know he's complaining about how Elektra took his toy. Because I've never seen either Ripley or Elektra form attachments to toys, it made me wonder if the desire to have toys is gender related. Of course, this made me think of the toys my husband has acquired.
Hmm...the toys my husband has. We have the Playstation, the Xbox, his massive collection of comic books, figurines of Chinese deities, swords and other martial arts stuff, guitars galore (I know he's a musician but does he need that many guitars?), walking sticks (What the heck? He's not an old man. He's never even used one stick during our hikes) and of course, his motorcycle. Oh boy, he takes care of his motorcycle as if it were a delicate baby especially when he polishes it down. I wish he would give the dishes the same attention. Thank god he's not into sports otherwise we would have sports memorabilia that I would have to give away without him knowing. This man has more things than I do. Certainly, he's got more hair products, and I'm the female in the relationship!
What is it with boys and their toys? I realize that not every man has to have toys but it seems as if many of them do. And, there are probably women out there who have their toys but I believe the majority is more interested in adorning themselves with nice clothes, shoes or jewelry. I know I am. Do men need something to preoccupy their hands? Perhaps they need external distractions to avoid evaluating what's going on internally? Or is it because they just refuse to grow up?
Maybe men do need something to keep their hands busy. It could have originated from when men were the hunters and women the gathers. I'm thinking that because men don't need to hunt for our food any longer, they neither get physically exhausted nor experience the adrenalin rush from chasing an animal. So, they look upon their toys to give them those sensations. What the spears did for those hunters, the controllers for these video games (or even the remote control) are doing for men of our time. Who knows. I'm just theorizing here.
Okay, are men wanting external distractions so they don't have to deal with internal issues? Let's just say "OH YEAH!" on that. To be fair, not all men, but many of them avoid expressing what's going on internally. I know, there are also women who create diversions for the same reason. Honestly, I don't know a lot of men who have voluntarily told me what was going on emotionally unless I dragged it out of them. Maybe it was just the men I happened to have chosen when I was single. You know, the emotionally unavailable ones, except for my husband of course. At least, Augustine gives me more than a one word answer most of the time. For sure, Morpheus would be more verbose than my husband if he could speak my language. I can see that he wants to tell me things, especially when he tilts his head to one side and starts making those talking sounds.
Do men cling to their toys because it makes them feel young or are they just mentally young? It's one thing to want to be "boyish" at the age of forty but who wants a forty year old boy? No thanks. I think I dated that guy a long time ago, and married the boyish one. How else would you describe a guy who asks your dogs, "Who wants to howl like a wolf?", and then howls at the top of his lungs causing all our dogs to howl in unison? This is my husband. Anyway, I don't think there's anything wrong with having "toys" because people need something pleasurable to take up their time when they're not working. Also, if having "toys" allow the inner child to come out, then that's even better. With the responsibilities of life, we all need to play. But I think, if women wanted to, we should be allowed to play with our partner's toys occasionally so we don't feel left out. Isn't that what we were taught in kindergarten, to share? It should also apply to the "big" boy toys.
Out of curiosity, I asked Augustine why he had all the toys I mentioned. He explained the reason for having each. The explanation that stuck most with me was his feeling of freedom from riding his motorcycle... Hmm, should I take that personally? Nah, I can relate. I've ridden on a motorcycle many times before and I can understand how the speed, the wind on your face and the openness of the road can feel so invigorating. I get similar sensations when I'm running and the endorphins have kicked in. I'm sure dogs feel likewise when they are racing around, just going absolutely nuts at a park or beach, and you see a huge smile on their face. It's as if time has stood still and there's no care in the world. It's a fantastic feeling!
I don't know about your household but in mine, toys do not last very long. A toy is usually shredded apart within minutes with Morpheus. But to see his smile and excitement when he knows there's a squeaky toy for him make the purchase so worth it for me. Although, I do sometimes think of the three venti iced green teas from Starbucks I could have bought with the money that one toy cost me after it's been destroyed so quickly. I'm just glad that Ripley and Elektra don't have the same reaction with toys. Ripley's toys last forever, unless Morpheus gets a hold of them. I have to hide her toys from him because once he has torn his to bits, he goes looking for Ripley's. Occasionally, he finds them, and when he does, Ripley would give me a look that says, "Oh well, no big deal." She's such a little Buddhist with her non-attachment attitude. With toys (and everything else), the bottom line is if my dogs are happy, then I'm happy. Isn't that the way every dog owner feels?
With regards to the kind of toys Morpheus likes, it has to squeak. If it doesn't make a sound, he's not interested. So, I have learned to buy only squeaky toys. This is similar to some guys who are fascinated with loud noise. The louder the better for them just like with their cars and motorcycles. When I play ball with Morpheus and Elektra, the balls I throw for Morpheus all squeak otherwise he won't bother retrieving them. One time I couldn't get to his ball fast enough, so I threw the one closest to me that didn't squeak. He stopped at his tracks, watched the ball roll and then gave me this look like "that one doesn't squeak!" Geez, he must have memorized all the balls that squeaked. How else could he have known? There are dozens of balls just laying around in the back yard. So, he waited until I got his special ball to throw. Go figure!
Sometimes, I wish Augustine would just be happy with a squeaky ball. We would have more room in the library and garage. Although if he were to collect squeaky balls, he would probably have bins full of different balls. But at least we would all be together playing outside and soaking in some sun, which would be healthy for all of us. Everybody needs Vitamin D that our body makes in response to sunlight, even dogs! Besides the health benefits of aiding in our bone growth, helping with calcium absorption, lowering the blood pressure, etc., it's been found that this natural Vitamin D attaches to cancer cells slowing down its growth and therefore reducing metastasis. It also prevents formation of capillaries that cancer cells need to supply them with food. Definitely, our body needs this vitamin!
On a side note, I wouldn't be surprised to find a Vitamin D deficiency in people. It seems as if most people don't get enough sunshine just because they are indoors when they are at work and then at home, they are probably either in front of a computer or television. Thank goodness for dogs. It's due to them that many owners venture outside and are able to get sunlight.
Love your dog. If you don't have one, adopt or save one. Then, go outside, throw a ball, frisbee, or whatever toy your dog loves, and play with them. Shed your "adult" self (which is easy to do when your with your dog), allow yourself to be childlike and have fun under the sun. It's healthy for everyone involved physically, mentally and emotionally.
Thank you for visiting my weekly blog. Any comments are welcomed.
Since that red doll, I haven't seen Morpheus behave the same way with the other toys I've bought him. He's never displayed the tenderness nor attachment he had with the red doll. Ripley and Elektra are not into toys. Occasionally, Elektra enjoyed chewing on a squeaky ball and tormenting Morpheus with it when he didn't have one. Even though I would give each one the same squeaky toy, Morpheus would somehow lose his and Elektra would become in possession of it. When that happens, Morpheus, like a little boy, would start barking and I know he's complaining about how Elektra took his toy. Because I've never seen either Ripley or Elektra form attachments to toys, it made me wonder if the desire to have toys is gender related. Of course, this made me think of the toys my husband has acquired.
Hmm...the toys my husband has. We have the Playstation, the Xbox, his massive collection of comic books, figurines of Chinese deities, swords and other martial arts stuff, guitars galore (I know he's a musician but does he need that many guitars?), walking sticks (What the heck? He's not an old man. He's never even used one stick during our hikes) and of course, his motorcycle. Oh boy, he takes care of his motorcycle as if it were a delicate baby especially when he polishes it down. I wish he would give the dishes the same attention. Thank god he's not into sports otherwise we would have sports memorabilia that I would have to give away without him knowing. This man has more things than I do. Certainly, he's got more hair products, and I'm the female in the relationship!
What is it with boys and their toys? I realize that not every man has to have toys but it seems as if many of them do. And, there are probably women out there who have their toys but I believe the majority is more interested in adorning themselves with nice clothes, shoes or jewelry. I know I am. Do men need something to preoccupy their hands? Perhaps they need external distractions to avoid evaluating what's going on internally? Or is it because they just refuse to grow up?
Maybe men do need something to keep their hands busy. It could have originated from when men were the hunters and women the gathers. I'm thinking that because men don't need to hunt for our food any longer, they neither get physically exhausted nor experience the adrenalin rush from chasing an animal. So, they look upon their toys to give them those sensations. What the spears did for those hunters, the controllers for these video games (or even the remote control) are doing for men of our time. Who knows. I'm just theorizing here.
Okay, are men wanting external distractions so they don't have to deal with internal issues? Let's just say "OH YEAH!" on that. To be fair, not all men, but many of them avoid expressing what's going on internally. I know, there are also women who create diversions for the same reason. Honestly, I don't know a lot of men who have voluntarily told me what was going on emotionally unless I dragged it out of them. Maybe it was just the men I happened to have chosen when I was single. You know, the emotionally unavailable ones, except for my husband of course. At least, Augustine gives me more than a one word answer most of the time. For sure, Morpheus would be more verbose than my husband if he could speak my language. I can see that he wants to tell me things, especially when he tilts his head to one side and starts making those talking sounds.
Do men cling to their toys because it makes them feel young or are they just mentally young? It's one thing to want to be "boyish" at the age of forty but who wants a forty year old boy? No thanks. I think I dated that guy a long time ago, and married the boyish one. How else would you describe a guy who asks your dogs, "Who wants to howl like a wolf?", and then howls at the top of his lungs causing all our dogs to howl in unison? This is my husband. Anyway, I don't think there's anything wrong with having "toys" because people need something pleasurable to take up their time when they're not working. Also, if having "toys" allow the inner child to come out, then that's even better. With the responsibilities of life, we all need to play. But I think, if women wanted to, we should be allowed to play with our partner's toys occasionally so we don't feel left out. Isn't that what we were taught in kindergarten, to share? It should also apply to the "big" boy toys.
Out of curiosity, I asked Augustine why he had all the toys I mentioned. He explained the reason for having each. The explanation that stuck most with me was his feeling of freedom from riding his motorcycle... Hmm, should I take that personally? Nah, I can relate. I've ridden on a motorcycle many times before and I can understand how the speed, the wind on your face and the openness of the road can feel so invigorating. I get similar sensations when I'm running and the endorphins have kicked in. I'm sure dogs feel likewise when they are racing around, just going absolutely nuts at a park or beach, and you see a huge smile on their face. It's as if time has stood still and there's no care in the world. It's a fantastic feeling!
I don't know about your household but in mine, toys do not last very long. A toy is usually shredded apart within minutes with Morpheus. But to see his smile and excitement when he knows there's a squeaky toy for him make the purchase so worth it for me. Although, I do sometimes think of the three venti iced green teas from Starbucks I could have bought with the money that one toy cost me after it's been destroyed so quickly. I'm just glad that Ripley and Elektra don't have the same reaction with toys. Ripley's toys last forever, unless Morpheus gets a hold of them. I have to hide her toys from him because once he has torn his to bits, he goes looking for Ripley's. Occasionally, he finds them, and when he does, Ripley would give me a look that says, "Oh well, no big deal." She's such a little Buddhist with her non-attachment attitude. With toys (and everything else), the bottom line is if my dogs are happy, then I'm happy. Isn't that the way every dog owner feels?
With regards to the kind of toys Morpheus likes, it has to squeak. If it doesn't make a sound, he's not interested. So, I have learned to buy only squeaky toys. This is similar to some guys who are fascinated with loud noise. The louder the better for them just like with their cars and motorcycles. When I play ball with Morpheus and Elektra, the balls I throw for Morpheus all squeak otherwise he won't bother retrieving them. One time I couldn't get to his ball fast enough, so I threw the one closest to me that didn't squeak. He stopped at his tracks, watched the ball roll and then gave me this look like "that one doesn't squeak!" Geez, he must have memorized all the balls that squeaked. How else could he have known? There are dozens of balls just laying around in the back yard. So, he waited until I got his special ball to throw. Go figure!
Sometimes, I wish Augustine would just be happy with a squeaky ball. We would have more room in the library and garage. Although if he were to collect squeaky balls, he would probably have bins full of different balls. But at least we would all be together playing outside and soaking in some sun, which would be healthy for all of us. Everybody needs Vitamin D that our body makes in response to sunlight, even dogs! Besides the health benefits of aiding in our bone growth, helping with calcium absorption, lowering the blood pressure, etc., it's been found that this natural Vitamin D attaches to cancer cells slowing down its growth and therefore reducing metastasis. It also prevents formation of capillaries that cancer cells need to supply them with food. Definitely, our body needs this vitamin!
On a side note, I wouldn't be surprised to find a Vitamin D deficiency in people. It seems as if most people don't get enough sunshine just because they are indoors when they are at work and then at home, they are probably either in front of a computer or television. Thank goodness for dogs. It's due to them that many owners venture outside and are able to get sunlight.
Love your dog. If you don't have one, adopt or save one. Then, go outside, throw a ball, frisbee, or whatever toy your dog loves, and play with them. Shed your "adult" self (which is easy to do when your with your dog), allow yourself to be childlike and have fun under the sun. It's healthy for everyone involved physically, mentally and emotionally.
Thank you for visiting my weekly blog. Any comments are welcomed.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Chop-Chop!
Have you noticed that people are always rushing? This is really apparent driving on the freeways of Los Angeles. Even when it's bumper to bumper traffic, there's always someone constantly switching lanes trying to get ahead of everybody. Are we in such a hurry? Or are we just trying to catch up with time? I swear it seems as if time has accelerated ever since I turned thirty. I had heard people say that time just hurtles by after a certain age but I never believed them until it happened. I'm sure it's because of all the responsibilities you acquire as life progresses. Sometimes, there's not enough time to do everything, which is why some people say, "If only there were more time in the day." I certainly don't want more time, I'll just fill it up with things to do. I'd rather have less responsibilities which will automatically give me more time. But that's wishful thinking.
I don't know about your morning routine, but mine is very busy right before I go to work. Make the bed, put a load of laundry in the wash (it seems as if I do laundry everyday), put the dishes away, and get the dogs' food ready. And, because I'm such a clean freak, which I never realized I was until I had dogs, I would either sweep or vacuum the floors. In between all that, I try to eat my breakfast. Of course, I can never forget to play ball with Morpheus and Elektra in the mornings because Morpheus follows me around the house until I put on my tennis shoes and play outside. Ripley, who is above playing ball, usually sits in the sun and watches.
Naturally, I get stressed out in my attempt to get things done all at once. But I'm unaware of my stress until I get a glimpse of Morpheus walking behind me looking so distressed. He is the most sensitive dog out of the three I have. So, when I see the anxiety on his face, I know that he's picking up my stress, which immediately reminds me to take a deep breath and relax. I certainly don't want to worry Morpheus because it affects his digestive system. He starts to feel nauseous. In Chinese Medicine, this is what you would call Liver Overacting on the Stomach. This means that your frazzled energy or "qi", which is governed by the liver (not the organ itself), immediately attacks the stomach causing the nausea. It could cause other symptoms but for Morpheus it's nausea.
Just by the mere act of mindfully taking in oxygen into the body and releasing the carbon dioxide by blowing it out is so grounding. My mind thinks better when I'm in a state of serenity because it also puts things in perspective for me. With a clear frame of mind, I realize that the laundry, the bed, the dishes, etc. can all wait until I get home from work. They are not as important as my dogs. Making time for my dogs is a priority, which I admit I forget sometimes when I am caught up in my routine or work. My dogs shouldn't have to wait until there's enough time for them. It isn't fair. It is similar to a child waiting for two busy, hard working parents to make time for him in their schedule. Why have a dog or child if you don't spend time with him?
There have been a few dogs who have come to see me for treatments that I knew immediately were neglected judging from their appearance. They were either overweight or had muscle atrophy due to lack of exercise, and some were dirty and stinky. You could tell they slept outdoors and didn't get much care. Also, in their eyes, the sadness and lack of spirit were evident. The owners of these dogs were too busy to minister to their needs which infuriates me to hear and see. Again, why have a dog? Fortunately, not many of these owners bring their dogs to me.
It's so easy to forget your dog when you're focusing on what needs to get done at home or work. But dogs need your time and attention. They shouldn't end up being in the background of your life just because you are too busy. Isn't it bad enough that sometimes in our hurriedness, we end up rushing our dogs too? We rush them along to pee, poop, walk, or eat because we're either late for work, tired, cold, or whatever reason we may have, instead of giving them the time they need. Why create further tension for them when they already take in our stress when we are under it?
When it was raining regularly for awhile, and we had some serious down pour, I know I was scurrying my dogs along. "Come on guys! What's the deal? Start peeing or something!" is what I had heard myself saying. I'm not a saint. I know I have a tendency to rush my dogs occasionally. I'm sure my dogs tried their best to squeeze out whatever they could under that pressure, which makes me feel guilty when I think about it. So, I do try to be cognizant of my behavior.
Think how anxious and upset you would feel if there was someone knocking at the bathroom door telling you to hurry up and go. I know my husband wouldn't enjoy his comic books if I did that to him. Thank goodness we have our own bathrooms. The stress of knowing that someone was waiting for you to finish quickly would prevent you from having a satisfying bowel movement. And, even if you were just urinating, determining when to stop the flow of stream would be unpleasant and annoying especially if you've drank a few cups of coffee. Because sometimes you think you're done, and then there's more trickling out.
Have you noticed that dogs never rush? (Although there are some dogs who devour their food in seconds) They take their time sniffing and really identifying what they're smelling during their walks. They look around and become so aware of their surroundings that they seem to notice every squirrel or creature that passes in front of them. When I'm not power walking my dogs and I allow them to lollygag, I enjoy just watching them be so absorbed with everything around them. And, it makes me think that we as humans should learn to do that every once in awhile. We miss so many details when we don't slow down and pay attention to our surroundings.
There have been mornings when I'm at the park with my dogs and I force myself to really look at the trees around me instead of just looking straight ahead and mentally planning my day. It's surprising and exhilarating what you can discover when you give total attention to your environment. The nuance of colors, the way in which sunlight passes through the leaves, and the subtle exercise plants and trees get from the wind, are all something that go unnoticed if you're not looking. Just observing those things made me feel suddenly joyful. It's no wonder my dogs love going to the park. They probably experience what I felt briefly all the time, since they are more in tuned with nature. They know how to slow down and just be.
There are people who do take the time to slow down and decompress for the sake of their dog. I have a doggie patient name Buddy who sees me every week for acupuncture, and has a very devoted "dad" that takes great care of him. At the end of every treatment, I always hear the dad say, "Come on mister, chop-chop!" Every time I hear him say that I smile because of the irony of the situation. The dad doesn't really expect Buddy to hurry up. It's a way to motivate him to move all his legs. Buddy cannot move fast. He has had three strokes in his lifetime. Because his hind legs didn't completely recover from the last stroke (although he's making wonderful strides towards its), Buddy wears booties for them to help him walk as well as prevent his paws from scraping. He also wears a harness for the hind end so that his dad can assist him in walking. Clearly, Buddy requires tremendous time and attention for his care, which his dad gives lovingly and patiently. The commitment to ensure this dog's well-being really touches my heart.
I bring up the story of Buddy because his dad exemplifies an owner who truly makes his dog a priority. You should have seen the look he gave me when I had told him I had a seminar this whole weekend and wouldn't be working at the hospital. I knew he was thinking that Buddy wouldn't be getting his treatment because of my seminar. But, of course, he scheduled a treatment before the weekend came. Again, Buddy's needs were attended to no matter what. In fact, the dad has turned down work in the past just to spend more time with Buddy. Of course, when he does have to work, he makes sure that Buddy is completely taken care of, otherwise, Buddy's caretaker will feel his wrath! And, that's not pretty! It's hilarious to hear about it but not to receive it.
Love your dog. If you don't have one, adopt or save one. Then, give your dog the time and attention he needs and deserves. After all, it was your choice to have him. A dog isn't an inanimate object devoid of feelings to be dealt with later. He needs you now while he is still alive. Dogs are not with us for very long due to their short life span. So, take a deep breath, slow down and smell the roses with them.
Thank you for visiting my weekly blog. Any comments are welcomed.
015
I don't know about your morning routine, but mine is very busy right before I go to work. Make the bed, put a load of laundry in the wash (it seems as if I do laundry everyday), put the dishes away, and get the dogs' food ready. And, because I'm such a clean freak, which I never realized I was until I had dogs, I would either sweep or vacuum the floors. In between all that, I try to eat my breakfast. Of course, I can never forget to play ball with Morpheus and Elektra in the mornings because Morpheus follows me around the house until I put on my tennis shoes and play outside. Ripley, who is above playing ball, usually sits in the sun and watches.
Naturally, I get stressed out in my attempt to get things done all at once. But I'm unaware of my stress until I get a glimpse of Morpheus walking behind me looking so distressed. He is the most sensitive dog out of the three I have. So, when I see the anxiety on his face, I know that he's picking up my stress, which immediately reminds me to take a deep breath and relax. I certainly don't want to worry Morpheus because it affects his digestive system. He starts to feel nauseous. In Chinese Medicine, this is what you would call Liver Overacting on the Stomach. This means that your frazzled energy or "qi", which is governed by the liver (not the organ itself), immediately attacks the stomach causing the nausea. It could cause other symptoms but for Morpheus it's nausea.
Just by the mere act of mindfully taking in oxygen into the body and releasing the carbon dioxide by blowing it out is so grounding. My mind thinks better when I'm in a state of serenity because it also puts things in perspective for me. With a clear frame of mind, I realize that the laundry, the bed, the dishes, etc. can all wait until I get home from work. They are not as important as my dogs. Making time for my dogs is a priority, which I admit I forget sometimes when I am caught up in my routine or work. My dogs shouldn't have to wait until there's enough time for them. It isn't fair. It is similar to a child waiting for two busy, hard working parents to make time for him in their schedule. Why have a dog or child if you don't spend time with him?
There have been a few dogs who have come to see me for treatments that I knew immediately were neglected judging from their appearance. They were either overweight or had muscle atrophy due to lack of exercise, and some were dirty and stinky. You could tell they slept outdoors and didn't get much care. Also, in their eyes, the sadness and lack of spirit were evident. The owners of these dogs were too busy to minister to their needs which infuriates me to hear and see. Again, why have a dog? Fortunately, not many of these owners bring their dogs to me.
It's so easy to forget your dog when you're focusing on what needs to get done at home or work. But dogs need your time and attention. They shouldn't end up being in the background of your life just because you are too busy. Isn't it bad enough that sometimes in our hurriedness, we end up rushing our dogs too? We rush them along to pee, poop, walk, or eat because we're either late for work, tired, cold, or whatever reason we may have, instead of giving them the time they need. Why create further tension for them when they already take in our stress when we are under it?
When it was raining regularly for awhile, and we had some serious down pour, I know I was scurrying my dogs along. "Come on guys! What's the deal? Start peeing or something!" is what I had heard myself saying. I'm not a saint. I know I have a tendency to rush my dogs occasionally. I'm sure my dogs tried their best to squeeze out whatever they could under that pressure, which makes me feel guilty when I think about it. So, I do try to be cognizant of my behavior.
Think how anxious and upset you would feel if there was someone knocking at the bathroom door telling you to hurry up and go. I know my husband wouldn't enjoy his comic books if I did that to him. Thank goodness we have our own bathrooms. The stress of knowing that someone was waiting for you to finish quickly would prevent you from having a satisfying bowel movement. And, even if you were just urinating, determining when to stop the flow of stream would be unpleasant and annoying especially if you've drank a few cups of coffee. Because sometimes you think you're done, and then there's more trickling out.
Have you noticed that dogs never rush? (Although there are some dogs who devour their food in seconds) They take their time sniffing and really identifying what they're smelling during their walks. They look around and become so aware of their surroundings that they seem to notice every squirrel or creature that passes in front of them. When I'm not power walking my dogs and I allow them to lollygag, I enjoy just watching them be so absorbed with everything around them. And, it makes me think that we as humans should learn to do that every once in awhile. We miss so many details when we don't slow down and pay attention to our surroundings.
There have been mornings when I'm at the park with my dogs and I force myself to really look at the trees around me instead of just looking straight ahead and mentally planning my day. It's surprising and exhilarating what you can discover when you give total attention to your environment. The nuance of colors, the way in which sunlight passes through the leaves, and the subtle exercise plants and trees get from the wind, are all something that go unnoticed if you're not looking. Just observing those things made me feel suddenly joyful. It's no wonder my dogs love going to the park. They probably experience what I felt briefly all the time, since they are more in tuned with nature. They know how to slow down and just be.
There are people who do take the time to slow down and decompress for the sake of their dog. I have a doggie patient name Buddy who sees me every week for acupuncture, and has a very devoted "dad" that takes great care of him. At the end of every treatment, I always hear the dad say, "Come on mister, chop-chop!" Every time I hear him say that I smile because of the irony of the situation. The dad doesn't really expect Buddy to hurry up. It's a way to motivate him to move all his legs. Buddy cannot move fast. He has had three strokes in his lifetime. Because his hind legs didn't completely recover from the last stroke (although he's making wonderful strides towards its), Buddy wears booties for them to help him walk as well as prevent his paws from scraping. He also wears a harness for the hind end so that his dad can assist him in walking. Clearly, Buddy requires tremendous time and attention for his care, which his dad gives lovingly and patiently. The commitment to ensure this dog's well-being really touches my heart.
I bring up the story of Buddy because his dad exemplifies an owner who truly makes his dog a priority. You should have seen the look he gave me when I had told him I had a seminar this whole weekend and wouldn't be working at the hospital. I knew he was thinking that Buddy wouldn't be getting his treatment because of my seminar. But, of course, he scheduled a treatment before the weekend came. Again, Buddy's needs were attended to no matter what. In fact, the dad has turned down work in the past just to spend more time with Buddy. Of course, when he does have to work, he makes sure that Buddy is completely taken care of, otherwise, Buddy's caretaker will feel his wrath! And, that's not pretty! It's hilarious to hear about it but not to receive it.
Love your dog. If you don't have one, adopt or save one. Then, give your dog the time and attention he needs and deserves. After all, it was your choice to have him. A dog isn't an inanimate object devoid of feelings to be dealt with later. He needs you now while he is still alive. Dogs are not with us for very long due to their short life span. So, take a deep breath, slow down and smell the roses with them.
Thank you for visiting my weekly blog. Any comments are welcomed.
015
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Dog vs. "Dog"
Through the years of treating animals with acupuncture, I've been asked a number of times, "What animal wouldn't you treat?" Without hesitation, my answer is always,"snakes!" I know it's a reptile but that makes no difference to me. Sorry snake lovers, I don't mean to offend you, but there's no way I would treat your pet of choice. Even if you pleaded with me to treat your suffering, dying snake, I would have to say, "pass." I just can't do it. You would have to find another acupuncturist, otherwise your snake would continue to suffer and then die.
Ever since I was a little girl, I've had an aversion to snakes. I don't know why. Maybe it's the texture of their skin or the way they slither around that makes my body cringe. I can remember clearly my first camp. There was a guy name Sandy who sat on a chair in the center of a circle of kids including myself. Intertwining his arms was a snake. Sandy was educating us on the amphibian, but I felt my brain shut down. It refused to absorb the information due to fear or repulsion, take your pick because it was probably both. Besides, my energy was focused on the snake, making sure that if it escaped Sandy's grip somehow, I would be ready to run.
When Sandy had finished giving his talk, he told all the boys and girls that they can come up one by one to pet the snake. Sandy noticed that I remained in my chair along with another little girl. So, he asked both of us if we wanted to touch the snake. The other girl was more courageous than I because she got up and hesitantly brushed the snake with her fingers. I, on the other hand, just looked straight at Sandy with my lips tightly together, and firmly shook my head "no" while thinking, "I'm not stupid! There's no way I'm going near that." Soon followed by my next thought, "Why does this man have a girl's name?" I was ten years old, okay?!! I wasn't savvy to the world yet.
So, this leads me to today's topic of the metaphors people use. Please know that I speak for all dogs, or at least my three dogs. When speaking of men who act like jerks and scoundrels, can we please refer to them as "snakes" instead of "dogs"? Why must people continue to say, "He's such a dog!"? This is an insult to dogs. Dogs are loyal and trustworthy. They would never cheat on you or treat you like dirt. More importantly, you can rest assured that when you go to sleep next to a dog, no harm will be done to you.
But a snake, specifically a python, is not so trustworthy. If it breaks out of its glass container near your bed (because a snake is known to be a great escape artist), you may not wake up the next day. Chances are the python may choke you to death in your sleep. There have been reports of that happening. Where's the loyalty or trust in that behavior? Isn't a snake a more likely representative for an untrustworthy louse of a man? Yes, I know that there are women with these characteristics. But the majority of people associate the metaphor to men.
Also, let's stop saying, "He's a lying dog!" Why a dog? Dogs are so honest. They cannot hide their true feelings. Just look into their eyes and you'll see the truth. I remember when I was taking care of my sister's dog Bailey at the end of last year. Bailey, a bug-eyed Boston Terrier, had a habit of peeing and pooping in the house, which she doesn't do anymore, thank god. One morning I found poop in the living room just as I was going to let the dogs out to do their business. I asked my dogs and Bailey, "Who did this?" pointing at the poop. First, I looked at my three dogs who stood there staring back at me. Seeing the expression in their wide eyes, I could tell each were saying, "I didn't do it. I swear, mom!" And, I believed them. I knew they were innocent.
However, when I looked at Bailey, she had jumped on the couch and went into the down position. "Did you do this?" I calmly asked her. Bailey immediately covered her face between her front paws (she was so cute, I had to stop myself from smiling). When she finally looked up at me a few seconds later, I repeated my question sternly just to see her reaction again. She averted her eyes from me and hid her face the second time. She couldn't look at me because she knew I would see the truth. Judging from her behavior, I knew she was the culprit.
In comparison, snakes have no expressions. How could they? They have no external ears, eyelashes or eyelids. They only have their beady, little eyes. Without facial features, and having black, globular eyes, it's more difficult seeing the truth in their face. Do we not look upon the eyes as the seat of the soul where we search for truth? In fact, I would be more suspicious of a guy with beady eyes than one with soft, big eyes. Quick survey: who would you trust with your dog, John Malkovich or George Clooney?......I would be surprised if anyone chose John Malkovich with those creepy, closely set, eyes of his (although I worked with someone who thought he was drop dead gorgeous).
And, who came up with, "You lazy dog!"? Dogs are far from lazy. They want to work. They just have to be given a job. For example, Ripley's job is to alert Morpheus and Elektra of any strange noise outside the house, and they investigate. Talk about teamwork. Morpheus and Elektra have an extra task of making sure that the yards are clear of any critters including human ones. Morpheus guards the front while Elektra watches over the back. They take their work very seriously. They are better than a security alarm system that people have in their homes. The loud sound of an alarm system may deter some intruders but I think most (if not all) will be dissuaded by the possibility of a dog's bite when the barking begins.
Pray tell, what kind of job could a snake possibly do around the house? Okay, maybe it could catch some rats for you, but I cannot imagine any snake actively hunting for rodents, catch one and drop it in front of its owner. If it were to capture a rat, it would be for the reason of feeding itself. I don't know why but I imagine a snake to be selfish (maybe because it's not a social creature), which is the complete opposite of a dog. So, "lazy" is a more appropriate description for a snake as a pet.
Finally, why must some people call an ugly, hideous person a "dog"? I haven't met a dog I didn't find adorable in some way. A dirty dog could look unappealing I suppose, but after it's been bathed, it's beautiful again. And, if there were an unpleasant looking dog out there, the minute it starts to smile, wag its tail and show affection to you, its inner beauty would come out....Can you tell my bias towards dogs?
In contrast, a snake is limbless (no hugs from a snake unless you count strangling), expressionless, shows no affection, and when it starts to wag its short tail, it's warning you to stay away. These are all attributes that point to "unattractive." A snake neither elicits any warmth nor fuzzy feelings that you would get from a dog. So, the word "snake" or even "worm", which is like a miniature snake to me, should replace "dog" in these familiar metaphors.
Would it be so much to ask to change, or even discard these metaphors implying that a dog is an unworthy animal? I think not. Whenever I hear someone use dogs negatively in a metaphor, I let that person know that it's very degrading to dogs. I believe that the person who originated these figure of speeches clearly had no understanding nor insights on dogs. Certainly, he was no dog lover otherwise he would have used a different animal to scorn, like a snake.
Talking about figure of speech, if curiosity killed the cat, then it's curiosity that will get a dog bitten by a snake. Please know that if this happens, the first two hours after the bite is crucial for the dog's life. You need to get your dog to the emergency vet and hope that they have the antidote "antivenin" for the snake bite in case the snake was poisonous. Being able to identify the type of snake that had bitten your dog would be advantageous for his treatment. Some signs that your dog may exhibit if bitten are panting, drooling, weakness, vomiting, and shock. Also, on the site of the bite, there will be swelling and two puncture wounds.
Love your dog. If you don't have one, adopt or save one. And, if you value your dog's life, please be alert and aware of his whereabouts and behavior, especially if he is off leash, when hiking in areas where there may be snakes that could strike at your beloved dog. Lastly, the dog I know and love isn't the same "dog" used in well known metaphors. So, please refrain from using metaphors with dogs unless of course they are personified in a positive light.
Thanks again for visiting my weekly blog. Any comments are always welcomed.
Ever since I was a little girl, I've had an aversion to snakes. I don't know why. Maybe it's the texture of their skin or the way they slither around that makes my body cringe. I can remember clearly my first camp. There was a guy name Sandy who sat on a chair in the center of a circle of kids including myself. Intertwining his arms was a snake. Sandy was educating us on the amphibian, but I felt my brain shut down. It refused to absorb the information due to fear or repulsion, take your pick because it was probably both. Besides, my energy was focused on the snake, making sure that if it escaped Sandy's grip somehow, I would be ready to run.
When Sandy had finished giving his talk, he told all the boys and girls that they can come up one by one to pet the snake. Sandy noticed that I remained in my chair along with another little girl. So, he asked both of us if we wanted to touch the snake. The other girl was more courageous than I because she got up and hesitantly brushed the snake with her fingers. I, on the other hand, just looked straight at Sandy with my lips tightly together, and firmly shook my head "no" while thinking, "I'm not stupid! There's no way I'm going near that." Soon followed by my next thought, "Why does this man have a girl's name?" I was ten years old, okay?!! I wasn't savvy to the world yet.
So, this leads me to today's topic of the metaphors people use. Please know that I speak for all dogs, or at least my three dogs. When speaking of men who act like jerks and scoundrels, can we please refer to them as "snakes" instead of "dogs"? Why must people continue to say, "He's such a dog!"? This is an insult to dogs. Dogs are loyal and trustworthy. They would never cheat on you or treat you like dirt. More importantly, you can rest assured that when you go to sleep next to a dog, no harm will be done to you.
But a snake, specifically a python, is not so trustworthy. If it breaks out of its glass container near your bed (because a snake is known to be a great escape artist), you may not wake up the next day. Chances are the python may choke you to death in your sleep. There have been reports of that happening. Where's the loyalty or trust in that behavior? Isn't a snake a more likely representative for an untrustworthy louse of a man? Yes, I know that there are women with these characteristics. But the majority of people associate the metaphor to men.
Also, let's stop saying, "He's a lying dog!" Why a dog? Dogs are so honest. They cannot hide their true feelings. Just look into their eyes and you'll see the truth. I remember when I was taking care of my sister's dog Bailey at the end of last year. Bailey, a bug-eyed Boston Terrier, had a habit of peeing and pooping in the house, which she doesn't do anymore, thank god. One morning I found poop in the living room just as I was going to let the dogs out to do their business. I asked my dogs and Bailey, "Who did this?" pointing at the poop. First, I looked at my three dogs who stood there staring back at me. Seeing the expression in their wide eyes, I could tell each were saying, "I didn't do it. I swear, mom!" And, I believed them. I knew they were innocent.
However, when I looked at Bailey, she had jumped on the couch and went into the down position. "Did you do this?" I calmly asked her. Bailey immediately covered her face between her front paws (she was so cute, I had to stop myself from smiling). When she finally looked up at me a few seconds later, I repeated my question sternly just to see her reaction again. She averted her eyes from me and hid her face the second time. She couldn't look at me because she knew I would see the truth. Judging from her behavior, I knew she was the culprit.
In comparison, snakes have no expressions. How could they? They have no external ears, eyelashes or eyelids. They only have their beady, little eyes. Without facial features, and having black, globular eyes, it's more difficult seeing the truth in their face. Do we not look upon the eyes as the seat of the soul where we search for truth? In fact, I would be more suspicious of a guy with beady eyes than one with soft, big eyes. Quick survey: who would you trust with your dog, John Malkovich or George Clooney?......I would be surprised if anyone chose John Malkovich with those creepy, closely set, eyes of his (although I worked with someone who thought he was drop dead gorgeous).
And, who came up with, "You lazy dog!"? Dogs are far from lazy. They want to work. They just have to be given a job. For example, Ripley's job is to alert Morpheus and Elektra of any strange noise outside the house, and they investigate. Talk about teamwork. Morpheus and Elektra have an extra task of making sure that the yards are clear of any critters including human ones. Morpheus guards the front while Elektra watches over the back. They take their work very seriously. They are better than a security alarm system that people have in their homes. The loud sound of an alarm system may deter some intruders but I think most (if not all) will be dissuaded by the possibility of a dog's bite when the barking begins.
Pray tell, what kind of job could a snake possibly do around the house? Okay, maybe it could catch some rats for you, but I cannot imagine any snake actively hunting for rodents, catch one and drop it in front of its owner. If it were to capture a rat, it would be for the reason of feeding itself. I don't know why but I imagine a snake to be selfish (maybe because it's not a social creature), which is the complete opposite of a dog. So, "lazy" is a more appropriate description for a snake as a pet.
Finally, why must some people call an ugly, hideous person a "dog"? I haven't met a dog I didn't find adorable in some way. A dirty dog could look unappealing I suppose, but after it's been bathed, it's beautiful again. And, if there were an unpleasant looking dog out there, the minute it starts to smile, wag its tail and show affection to you, its inner beauty would come out....Can you tell my bias towards dogs?
In contrast, a snake is limbless (no hugs from a snake unless you count strangling), expressionless, shows no affection, and when it starts to wag its short tail, it's warning you to stay away. These are all attributes that point to "unattractive." A snake neither elicits any warmth nor fuzzy feelings that you would get from a dog. So, the word "snake" or even "worm", which is like a miniature snake to me, should replace "dog" in these familiar metaphors.
Would it be so much to ask to change, or even discard these metaphors implying that a dog is an unworthy animal? I think not. Whenever I hear someone use dogs negatively in a metaphor, I let that person know that it's very degrading to dogs. I believe that the person who originated these figure of speeches clearly had no understanding nor insights on dogs. Certainly, he was no dog lover otherwise he would have used a different animal to scorn, like a snake.
Talking about figure of speech, if curiosity killed the cat, then it's curiosity that will get a dog bitten by a snake. Please know that if this happens, the first two hours after the bite is crucial for the dog's life. You need to get your dog to the emergency vet and hope that they have the antidote "antivenin" for the snake bite in case the snake was poisonous. Being able to identify the type of snake that had bitten your dog would be advantageous for his treatment. Some signs that your dog may exhibit if bitten are panting, drooling, weakness, vomiting, and shock. Also, on the site of the bite, there will be swelling and two puncture wounds.
Love your dog. If you don't have one, adopt or save one. And, if you value your dog's life, please be alert and aware of his whereabouts and behavior, especially if he is off leash, when hiking in areas where there may be snakes that could strike at your beloved dog. Lastly, the dog I know and love isn't the same "dog" used in well known metaphors. So, please refrain from using metaphors with dogs unless of course they are personified in a positive light.
Thanks again for visiting my weekly blog. Any comments are always welcomed.
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